Many successful relationships begin with a humble beginning of dating. Later, two people end up getting married. Some of the marriages undergo a long dating relationship while others are short and exciting.
Regardless on how to people begin its relationship journey and ended up getting married, there are lots of ups and downs. All of us wanted to have a good relationship, but the road is not friendly and direct. We need to journey on a long and winding road. When good times come, it’s a blessing. Unfortunately, when bad times come, many couples consider it bad.
A Mom’s Message On Marriage
I stumbled with this answer in Quora written by someone who shared his mother’s message to him about marriage. His mother share her experienced with his son when he asked the mother;
Mom, do you think you enjoyed being married more when you first got married, or do you enjoy it more now?
Personally, I never thought of asking my mother with such question. Fortunately, I grew in a family in which our parents are in good relationship. Since childhood, I have witnessed the good fruits of marriage.
Let’s continue with mother’s answer to his son, which goes like this;
You know, a marriage is like a river. When it first starts out, it can be quite fierce. There are so many rocks and turbulence. Whitewater stretches where you can be holding on for dear life. And that’s exciting. When your dad and I were first married, I loved how everything was a new adventure. There was so much discovery. But as you keep going down the river, the channel cuts deeper, and the current flows more smoothly and stronger. I have to say that I love my marriage so much more now that I’m sailing on a deep current.
Pondering The Mother’s Message
When I first read it, I immediately realized and able to connect the experience of my parents as a married couple. Sadly, my father passed away, but mother is going stronger. Moreover, I can relate to this mother’s message to my own experience with marriage.
I am happily married for 10 years. We celebrated our 10th year wedding anniversary last June, this year 2016. Our dating period was close to 3 years. During that period, we’ve been able to adjust many differences. Our dating relationship was a good one. Although sometimes we end up with certain misunderstanding. When we got married, we though everything will be fine, it’s not. We experience ups and downs, but we managed to rise against those down times.
Marriage Is Really A Journey
While having better sex is great part of keeping a hot and exciting married life, there are things needs to be addressed. Although we thought we dated long enough and able to resolved many differences, still there are many differences emerge along the way. In our case, we agreed to have constant open communication. When something not good emerges, one of us stays cool.
This technique allows us to resolve many problems in a matter of hours. Although through constant communication, we talk openly about everything including health topics and the quality of sex we have. Sex is not everything in marriage. It is just one of the spices that keeps marriage exciting and make the relationship hot just like when we first met.
Did I Think About Cheating?
Cheating is a big issue for some couples. Both men and women cheats partners at some point in life. However, if there is a constant open communication between man and wife, cheating is not an issue. Yes, we talk about men and women we know who cheated. But instead of doing the same, we discuss the lessons learned from those mistakes.
We are not just a married couple, but best friends who shares our weaknesses and one fills up the other’s weakness. Along the journey of this marriage, we’ve met many couples who complaint about marriage. However, we have the opportunity to help explain to these couples how marriage works. It’s fun and fulfilling when you share something useful to other couples especially to those who have relationships going downhill.
If you have problems in your marriage that either or both of you can’t solve, don’t hesitate to ask help. Today, there are many sex therapists who are able to help you with your marriage problem. You’ll be able to find them in your local counselling services, or even online.
For those who are in a long distance relationship, read this article on how you can keep your relationship hot even if you’re miles apart.